Faithful
by Insomniac Owl
Summary: Light's coming back. She can feel it.


**Faithful**

_By Insomniac Owl_

-

The day after Light's funeral, Misa dresses (in nice clothes, like she's going out) and sits in the kitchen drinking wine. She considered scotch, then vodka – to get her drunk faster – but in the end it is wine. Wine is normal, expected; drinking it, it is easier to pretend Light might walk through the door at any moment; it's easier to pretend he isn't dead, and that she isn't sad.

She finishes another glass of wine, stumbling a bit on her way to the window. It's getting to her, all that alcohol. She shouldn't drink so much. She'll look awful in the morning, the way she always does when she's been drunk – hair a mess, makeup smeared (her morning face – but everything's worse when you're throwing up).

She should put the wine away. She should lie down too, if she wants to look her best for Light (and of course she does).

She pours another glass of shining red wine, and downs it.

**x**

Two days after Light's funeral, Misa gets drunk (again). She is the clingy sort of drunk, but there is no one to cling to, so she locks herself in the bathroom instead. Light, she tells herself, is waiting in the other room, and if she opens the door he'll be there.

She doesn't open it, though, too afraid of what she'll see - an empty room, an empty table, an empty wineglass.

Later, when Sayu comes to visit, she is crying on the bathroom floor.

"Misa is faithful," she says, clutching Sayu's shirtsleeve. "She's trying, but it's very hard…."

Sayu strokes her hair, and tells her everything will be okay.

**x**

Three days after Light's funeral, Misa puts away the wine – except for one glass, to steady herself – puts one her makeup and her nicest clothes, and waits.

Out the window, the city is terribly clear. The air conditioner hums, cooling the hot, muggy air inside, but it can't do a thing for the city. Like a bug under a magnifying glass, it will burn – judgment rendered and all that jazz. She'll be the only one left, in the end, the only one alive in a pile of ashes and leftover sin….

Her hands shake against the kitchen table, and she forces them down, palms flat, breathing deeply to calm herself. Sunlight spills through the window above the sink, spreading itself over the table and her hands pressed against the wood hard enough to hurt.

He is coming. She can feel it.

**x**

Nighttime finds her at the kitchen table – drunk again, crying again too, makeup running all down her face.

"Misa is faithful," she says, as though reassuring herself. "Misa is the most faithful…."

An extra glass sits at the other end of the table, gathering dust.

**x**

Several days later, Sayu comes to visit again. The apartment is littered with empty wine bottles, and stinking of it where Misa knocked cups over, or left them out too long. Misa is lying on her bed, staring at the wall, and the television is on – Channel Twelve News.

"… crime rates actually appear be _fall_ing; government officials speculate that the public…."

"Misa?"

Sayu moves to stand beside the bed, touching her shoulder. Misa turns over, and Sayu is startled to see how unfocused her eyes are. She's drunk again. Probably can't even hear the television.

"How are you?" Sayu asks, a little nervously. "I wanted to see if you were okay, if you needed anything. My mom… I told her how much you've been drinking, and she agreed with me that Light's death would –"

"You're not faithful like Misa-chan." Misa pushes herself up, and her eyes, though slightly unfocused, are hateful. "Misa has waited _fifteen days_ for him; it's hard and she has been very, very sad, but she has _faith_, and she's the _only one_! She's the only one who believes he's coming back!"

Sayu stares at her, silent, with absolutely no expression on her face. Stiffly, she pours Misa another glass of wine, and then she leaves.

Two hours later Misa is so drunk she can hardly see the floor. The windowsill swings under her hands, and the city outside is blurry; all she sees is darkness and shifting spots of light. They're moving too slowly, or else she is; either way she can't see a thing.

She clutches the stem of her wine glass, and imagines the city is burning.

**fini.**


End file.
